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"Beneath the makeup and behind the smile I am just a girl who wishes for the world."
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Monday, January 31, 2011

rainy day

It's somewhat of a cold, rainy day here in AZ- one of my favorite kinds of days, especially on my day off.  I was going to go for a hike, but when I woke up to the raindrops on my roof I knew that plan wasn't going to work and laid my head back down on my pillow for some extra sleep.

I finally heard from my "friend" who said she didn't even know I was upset with her.  After lots of text messages calling me names and trying to place blame elsewhere, I just stopped responding.  I don't have the energy for it.  Maybe later tonight I will address the issue more but for now I just want to enjoy "me time."

I recently got back in touch (long distace) with a former flame.  Gosh that term sounds so old fashioned.  We actually went to middle & high school together, went to the same college for a few years, and then after college started dating each other a bit.  I always found it funny that things never happened in the years and years I knew him growing up- but we were so different then.  I was crazy about him for a while but things just didn't work out.

We've both been betrayed recently and have been communicating more.  I don't know if it will turn into anything but it's fun to have him in my life again- even if it's for a fleeting moment.  It's funny how some things work out.
Saturday, January 29, 2011


Sparkles & Fate and I in high school... what a gem!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011

buffalo chicken dip

I kinda don't want to post this because I want to be the person with the best dip recipe but it's too good not to share and that would just be selfish of me.  With the end of football season, it is the perfect time to try this recipe out.  It is super easy, quick, and so so good!

3/4 C. Franks Buffalo Hot Sauce (I like it pretty hot so I usually dump half the bottle in)
2 10oz cans chunky white chicken, drained (I actually use 1 12.5ish oz can)
1 C. Ranch Dressing
2 8oz packages cream cheese, softened
Shredded cheddar cheese

Mix hot sauce, ranch dressing, cream cheese until smooth.  Gently add chucked chicken (before I add the chicken I dump it out on a cutting board and break it up into really small pieces with a fork and knife- it comes apart really easy). Mix everything together and put into an 8" or 9" casserole dish.

Bake at 300ยบ for 1/2 hour.  Sprinkle with cheddar cheese during the last 5 minutes.  Serve with tostido chips and/or celery sticks!
Monday, January 24, 2011

"friend" problem

"You deserve the world so stop settling and listen to your heart when dealing with others, but use your head when taking care of yourself." - Blue Eyed Girl

I think this is some of the best advice I have heard and how lucky am I that it came from a bloggy and IRL friend?  It's true.  I need to stop settling.  I think I do this a lot just because it's the easier option.  This will be one of my commandments for the Happiness Project which I still need to do a post on. 

Sorry this is so short but I just wanted to share that little quote with you!
Sunday, January 23, 2011

eharmony fail

So I was dating this guy for a few weeks and I could tell he definitely like me more than I liked him but I wanted to give it a fair shot and see if I could develope more feelings for him (remind me to never do this again, I need an instant attraction). 

Last Sunday I went to his sisters for a little get together with family and friends and met his fam for the first time.  At the end of the night he told me that he's not seeing anyone else nor does he want to.  I just sort of stood there, gave an awkward giggle and said something dumb like "thank you."

Last night I went out with him, his roommate, his gf, and then I invited my friend to meet up with us.  The guy and I go back to my friends, I end up going to bed earlier and then I wake up and she tells me something "happened" between them and said she didn't remember exactly what.  Are you kidding me?!

Now I definitely wasn't upset because I really didn't like him and thought it was a lost cause anyway but 1. Don't tell me you don't want to see anyone else and then hit on/mess around with my friend and 2. This is obviously not a very nice friend. 

I've had problems with her in the past with me and guys.  For one reason or another and I hate writing this because it sounds stuck up but guys usually like me over her.  This has made her a jealous person I think.  One guy that I was dating (while she had a boyfriend) she said she liked and then he got too clingy with me and I told her I wasn't sure how I was feeling about him and she got mad at me for something stupid and texted him saying I said all these bad things about him (which I didn't) and that I didn't like him. 

More recently, I went out with another guy I met on eHarmony and he had a tattoo that I wasn't the biggest fan of (a darwin fish) and shared that with her but I explained that it wasn't a deal breaker by any means and that as long as someone I'm with is accepting of my beliefs that's ok with me.  Well then she goes and joins eHarmony, gets matched up with him, starts talking to him, and tells him that I didn't like him. Stay out of my business!!

This last thing is my final straw I think.  I mean how many times can she try to ruin things for me?  And there are more stories than the ones I've just shared.  I don't know what to do with the relationship.  I feel like I can't trust her with anything personal and I'm sick of feeling betrayed.  She has some good qualities but I don't know where to draw the line.  And it's also hard because I don't really have many girlfriends here in town.  Any advice? Thoughts?

This whole situation makes me really glad I didn't tell any of my IRL friends about this blog- especially her! I'm so glad I can vent on here and get my feelings out.  :)
Monday, January 17, 2011

glam glow

 just trying out the glamglow mask for the first time!  i picked up a sample at bliss so i could try it before buying because it is somewhat pricey.  here's how cute i look with it on (not):

It's made with volcanic pumice rock, kaolin sea clay, and green tea.  I just washed it off and I must say, it's pretty amazing.  My skin looks and feels so much better.  It's super tingly when you first put it on, and then it turns to that lighter color when it's time to take it off.  I used some of my peeling groovy serum after and then my vivite glycolic moisturizer and it seems like they're both absorobing better because of the mask.  Guess this means I'll be buying the full size now!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011

bunny pass

Ok, so I know I haven't posted since the 4th, but I'm going to just go ahead and say that I get a pass because I have been seriously ill with the swine? flu.  I've never been so sick in my entire life and for a couple days I thought I was actually going to die.  Not fun.

I do have lots of stuff to share though once I get back to normal posting, like:
- pics from an 80s party
- my dad's birthday
- tucson tradgedy
- etc....
Tuesday, January 4, 2011


So there's a store here called "My Sisters Closet" for designer consignment items.  I've been shopping there for years and like to bring in things that I don't wear anymore for what I like to think of as "free money."  I'm not going to wear whatever it is anymore and rather than throw it out, I can make some cash on it, although I'm considering the blog sale idea too.

Anyways, a few months ago I was at Saks during their beauty week when they had these really cute snakeskin purses available for the event.  I got one and love it- it's nothing super fancy- just a great tote with cute hot pink lining.  Here's a pic I found online:
Image: karlasugar.net

I carry this bag almost everyday because its such a great "carryall" and I have a co-worker who is in love with it. She would have everyone in the office stop and look at the bag as she described how great it is and that she had dreams about it.  Well since I knew she liked it so much I tried tracking one down for her, called Saks, but no luck.  Then last week I was at Sissy's and they had a brand new one with the tags and everything!  Using my credit it only cost me around 10 bucks so I obviously had to get it for her.

I wrapped it up in a big box with wrapping paper and brought it in for her saying someone "dropped it off for her" earlier that day.  Once she opened it she knew it was me and was so happy.  I was just glad I was able to find it for her because I know what it's like when you want something that is no longer available.  She asked if she could pay me for it and I of course refused, after all, I used mostly "free money" but later she stopped by my desk with a gift bag saying she had to get me something so I open it up and what is it I see....
Image: Nordstrom.com

Are you serious?! I seriously almost started crying.  I have been wanting that watch for SO LONG but couldn't justify it.  It made me think that "good things come to those who wait" but I also feel bad because I only spent a little over 10 actual dollars- the rest was just money I happened to get from being thrifty ;)  I feel so lucky!

Monday, January 3, 2011

3 for 3 - go me!

I know posting 3 days in a row isn't that much but it's a lot more than I have been doing recently.

I didn't do anything for New Years Eve... well, I worked, which isn't that exciting so we can just skip that.  I felt soooo sick the entire night and woke up on New Years day still feeling sick so I just laid in bed until it was time to go to work again but I got a call that I didn't need to go so that was good.  Or suspicious, I'm not sure which yet.

And Sunday I should have gone to Church in the morning but my hair was a mess, I woke up 1/2 an hour before it started, and yeah... Later that day I met one of my eHarmony dates that I've gone on 3 dates with to play golf with my parents and I at his country club and have lunch.  You may be freaking out that he's met and hung out with my parents so soon but if a guy isn't into family things then I'm not into him.

Today I had a job interview for a serving position at a new restaurant thats opening next week and I got the job which I'm super excited about! :) It will bring me a lot more money and hopefully a lot less stress.

So so far, 2011 is going great- just like I predicted! :)
Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Years Traditions

Do you have any new years traditions?  Every year we have pork and sauerkraut for our New Years meal.  It's a German tradition that my moms family has been doing forever.  I used to HATE the sauerkraut but now I can't get enough of it.  It's funny how some things change like that.
Saturday, January 1, 2011


So long 2010- hellooooo 2011!  Although some really amazing things thing happened in 2010 (my niece was born), most of it was kind of a dud of year and I'm happy its '11 now.  11 has always been "my" number.  In fact, my birthday this year will be 11-11-11. 

I usually don't do new years resolutions but this year I feel like it so here they are:

1. Blog everyday (or almost everyday)
2. Workout more
3. Read a book a month
4. Become more involved in things (volunteering, church, classes of some sort)
5. Eat healthier
6. Run a half or full marathon (lofty, huh?)
7. Get a better job
8. Improve my golf game
9. Cook more
10. TBD...

Wish me luck and see you tomorrow!
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